Welcome to Cafe Ujima, the best place in town to hear exciting new poets! Today’s featured poets will leave you dazzled, provoked, and reflective. Enjoy the event, and don’t forget that hot beverages are half off. Just ask your server.
1. Please type your poem, and as you type look for opportunities to continue improving your techniques, word choice, or structure.
2. Post your poem in the “comments” section of this post.
3. Respond (reply) to each other by commenting on language (word choice), techniques, structure, or style. Discuss what you like about your classmates’ poems, and try to explain what those choices made you feel, think, or consider. When possible, “refer to the text” as you comment. Please respond to at least two of your classmates.
The Light of All the Stars
By Andres Magana
The light of all the suns cannot touch you
You shine more bright than every star combined
A person like you is amongst the few
For you would always be my valentine
My love for you is unconditional
Because it grows for you every day
You are no less than irresistable
In every aspect every way
From top to bottom you are pure beauty
When days are bad you make them very great
Darling you are more than just a cutie
The day i met you i knew it was fate
I beg you please don’t ever leave my side
I wait on the day i call you my bride
Poetry Is Like
My relationship with poetry is like a newborn to the world
The newborn isn’t aware of what is going on nor what it does
The newborn is set out to find out about life
As I am set out to find out about poetry
Newborns and life are still strangers to each other
Just lkke poetry and I are mutual through writhing
Today I may not be fully aware of the world of poetry
But like a newborn I will learn
Somewhere In America
Somewhere in America,
In an unprivileged hood,
There is a girl,
Who knows nothing but good.
Somewhere in America,
There is a funeral of a young black man,
Shot dead walking home with skittles in his hand.
Somewhere in America,
There is a gang filled with bloods,
With blood on their hands,
Because another brother wanted to take a stand.
Somewhere in America,
That good girl becomes bad,
We pass her on the corner,
Feeling ever so sad.
Somewhere in America,
The funeral of that kid becomes well known
More than his family ever did.
Somewhere in America,
Not just America.
Black on Black crime,
Gang violence,
And prostitution,
Are issues all around the world.
So I say,
Somewhere in America,
A small step has just been made,
That will make the changes for today.
I like the repetition of “Somewhere in America” and how you start off negative but then there is always hope
I like the theme of this and is the part about a boy with skittles true?
My best friend
Oh sister how do i love you dearly
You are just my little cup of sweet tea
You kept me happy and sometimes lonely
Oh sister you are so cute like a pea
I can’t help but laugh when we start a flight
Time passes, we’re mad and don’t really talk
You always know how to bring out the light
All we have to do is take a nice walk
I appreciate everything you to
I know i don’t say it most of the time
I’m also very grateful to have you
Without you there be no partner n crime
I’ve been here with you every single day
No day will pass without me saying hey
I like your couplet. Whether you two hate each other at the moment, you won’t let hate take over so you end up talking again.
I like your simile with the pea and your choice of words.
5
In Sacramento, The gentle sun smiles down on us, A gentle summer breeze slips across the street, But the gentleness is bewildered not sure if a positive or negative force is approaching on this reeling Friday night.
Four hours before gametime 5 youths in a car, Joyfully eating before their first playoff game, for some it may be their last meal.
Senior Jaulon Clavo, A cornerback gracefully enjoying the atmosphere with his fellow teammates, Malik Johnson senior fullback, One of few other fellow passengers enjoying his time being with his close teammates, Neither not knowing one of God’s children will not be present on this earth within minutes.
A car approaches as the five gentlemen are at a 3-way intersection, Anticipatingly waiting for their first playoff game, Are shot at leaving Jaulon clavo shot in the neck, Malik Johnson shot in the arm, They try to rush back to the school for help, why God, why.
They are rushed to hospital, Malik injured with a wound on the arm, minor severity, while Jaulon Clavo was kept alive for a brief moment kept alive due to God, Angels, and prayers, But sadly soonly dies at UC Davis hospital, why God, why.
Really like the part when you say, “Neither not knowing one of God’s children will not be present on this earth within minutes.” really adds to the suspenseful tone
The Cautious Antelope
The antelope standing tall
Observant of it surroundings
As the sun sets.
It’s standing alone scanning
Weary of every little sound
Like a child home alone
The antelope is a tourist
Wandering new unfamiliar territory
Watching for distant predators
Staying near family
The antelope walks quickly
Lurking behind bushes
Eating berries
Caution
Your simile “like a child home” is relatively worldly because many people can relate to.
i love your technique on showing different human like things the antelope was doing, does the antelope stand for something else????
Nice! I like your comparison of the antelope to a tourist
i like how you used simile to compare the antelope to a child being at home alone.
Dead Man Cries
In north sacramento
Its been raining but
Not the kind of rain
We want for our water
Chaos.
This rain is metal,
And hot like lava
It takes lives, smiles,
And peoples joy.
It also takes souls
From those who
Could have been
Successful.
Today my soul was
Took from me but,
I am not mad or bitter.
I am with the creator
Of our world the protector
Of our universe
My life was took in front
Of my school Grant high
Where I also played football.
Now I am a star in the sky,
Shinning bright as my smile.
My spirit will always shine
Bright in the stars, and in
My brothers hearts.
-Calvin Hudson
Great poem your use of rich imagery and the tone made me feel connected to the poem
I like how you put your poem in a different type of format and emphasized specific words.
The tone that you conveyed is very touching due to the numerous emotion imagery.
I really like the part when you talk about the rain and how you gave it 2 meanings
I like how you used the figurative language of simile in your poem. “And hit like lava.” “Shining bright as my smile.”
I really like your use of figurative language in the poem.
i love how you said”shining as bright as my smile” because your smile is sooo bright
I really like this poem. It is an allusion to JJ
i like how you said it’s not the kind of rain we want, chaos. <3
Sacred
Our relationship is truly sacred
You’re my patient and I’m your therapist
I listen to you when you have hatred
And you listen to me when I am pissed
You like royal blue but I just like blue
We’re both different you see, me and you
However we’re stuck together like glue
And that’s what makes us unique too
I am a clown when you’re broken-hearted
I will try to turn that frown upside down
It’s just what i do because it’s needed
Worlds without your laugh will drown
This is about you since you’re worth my time,
Every moment with you, my day just shines
Awh that’s cute
I liked how you compared your friendship with glue
I really like your couplet because it engraved the final touch to your sweet poem emphasizing your subject.
I like how you used metaphor about you being a clown and you conveyed the feelings of loneliness without a friend.
i like how you said your my patient, im your therapist(almost made me cry)
The Eagle
The eagle stands strong
Gazing over the ocean waves
As the orange sun sets
The eagle is like a kite
Soaring in the big blue sky
With eyes of a hawk
It protects its own kind
Striving to survive
The eagle opens its wings
Vanishing into the dark night
-freedom
I liked how in the 2ND stanza you compared an eagle to a kite
I liked the simile made when comparing the eagle to the kite
i like your imagery on how the eagle= freedom i enjoyed your symbol
The Wolf Within
Hidden from the world
Unpredictable, Unknown
The wolf is like a shield
Very defensive
About herself
And the ones she loves
It is a warrior
Who will attack if provoked
Without a warning
The wolf stands tall
-Strength
I like how you describe how the wolf is like. I also like your title. “The wolf within”
i like your comparison between a wolf and a shield.
The struggle
Immigrants fear the long journey to “El Norte”
The fence
The obstacle
Its what separates people from new opportunities and new lives
The desert
The death trap
The long, exhausting walk to get the United States
When one arrives it is a great relief that they made it, but the fear still lives
The fear that they will get deported and all the pain and effort they went through to get to the United States was worthless
There is one man who accuses us of being drug dealers and rapist
We are not the horrifying things that he says we are
We are humble people who wanted to escape the poverty and violence from our homelands
You
You are my headache in most of my day
And at times you get down and very blue
But i promise you it will be okay
Because i will always be here for you
The truth is your love is like ecstasy
I am so glad that i can call you mine
And i swear you have me feeling so free
Baby why you got to be so damn fine
To me your face is like art
I hope you do not take this at all wrong
Life with you is necessary like fart
To show my love, i would sing a song
Love for you is, endless and forever.
Love for you is, here and will leave never.
Line 11 with the idea of fart in comparison was Jesse Hong’s.
I like how I gave you that idea in line 11. Such a sexy poem
I couldn’t agree with you more Jesse. Thank you. @jesse hong
I agree with Jesse it is indeed a sexy poem. I also really like your simile on line 5 “your love is like ecstasy”
“Ode to my New Coat”
On my special day, my mother bought me a new coat
It’s as pure and innocent as a newborn
Without haste, I seized it in a tight hug
Without repulse, I bestowed a kiss
On its gentle skin of luscious, milky fur
I can detect a touch of lavender perfume
Snuggling on top of its golden beige surface
As I tenderly caressed it with my eyes locked
I can visualized myself embracing a humongous, amber mammoth
In Siberia or sunbathing on the glistening cream-colored sand
Of Honolulu’s beach
With baby waves staggering and clashing together
For a chance to whisper their secrets to the mole crabs
Yet, with everlasting warmth
It feels like I was also at my Grandparents’ toasty cabin
Amidst the scent of burning coals in the fireplace
Cookie aroma clandestinely snuck into every single room
Ode to my new coat
I like all the comparison you had for your new coat.
The Beauty Within
A bright golden sunflower awoken
by the warm touch of the sun
Its body slowly twisting facing the light
The sunflower is like a
ray of sunshine
radiant and glorious
It is the Sun that
forms a wonderful smile
across your face
The sunflower spreads
its petals and grin
-Beauty
I liked how you really talked about the relationship between the sunflower and sun.
I really enjoyed your poem because it made me smile due to the descriptions of the beauties in nature surrounding us; especially your comparisons with the sunflower and the sun’s rays.
i love how you created an idea of using the sunflower as a symbol of beauty. And i really liked how u didnt say the main idea of the poem until the end.
I liked how you defined beauty in a different way
I like how you personified the sunflower in lines 10&11. It sounds like it’s happy to be bloomed into this world.
I like the line “the sunflower is like a ray of sunshine radient and glorious” it is a great simile 🙂 nice poem samantha 🙂
A blossomed love It’s so curious:one can resist
Tears and behave very well in the hardest hours of grief.
But then someone makes you a friendly sign behind a window,
Or one notices that a flower that was in a bud only yesterday
Has suddendly blossomed,or a letter slips from a drawer….
And everything collapses
Flower petals in the breeze
Look like a butterfly flapping
Its wings. My love for you takes
Flight like a white orchid
Blushing pink.
I grew a garden in his heart.
There was plenty of space
For flowers,because his
Heart was completely
Empty of LOVE
i like your personification in the 1st line on how you gave to blossom human qualities by it being curious
I like when you said “There was plenty of space
For flowers,because his
Heart was completely
Empty of LOVE”
it sounds like you are trying to help him find love.
Mother… Nature
Mother nature is its very own creator. Yellow, white, red, and pink. The color needed to make it unique. Happy, sad, excited, even relieved. Mother nature still revealed Nature has its own mind. Uncontrolled even if we tried. Every mind blown by its unique trait. Always seems to be on point. With reality’s race. Human race ask nature for. The unretrievable maze. Too hot, too cold, too wet. Not enough sun. Or
Too much wind. Because nature is nature. It’s easy. To be ungrateful. Until you realize. It’s taken. For granted inevitably. So for the human race. We’re sorry.
I liked the tone and mood you conveyed in the poem. It showed us that we shouldn’t take our privilege for granted.
I enjoyed the way you rhymed pink and unique using and end rhyme and how you described the unpredictably of mother nature and the way individuals feel towards it
I enjoyed the imagery that you use to describe the mood, color, and feelings of mother nature.
I like how you said “Mother Nature is its very own creator” 🙂
Their Last Day
It was a beautiful morning,
Tuesday, September 11, 2001
The skies were clear
A slight breeze causing
Leaves to tickle the
Stone-hard cement grounds
Eagles soaring through the
Ceiling of the world,
Past the Twin Towers
Of lovely New York
Joy was passed around this day
But little did they know
Today was the end of their stay
Heaven would receive,
Receive thousands of new angels
Boom!
Suddenly, an airplane zoomed,
I saw the blurry words of
American Airlines Flight 11
It clashes through the
World Trade Center
Moments later,
A second plane!
I read United Airlines Flight 175
It flashes right after
The first plane
Joy shifts into panic
Chaos runs through
The streets at this moment
News reports say
“It appears that we have been
Hijacked!”
Families begin to worry
Kids calmly questioning
“What’s wrong mommy?
Daddy?”
Heartbreaking murmurs to
Their children
“Daddy is gone for a while.
Mommy will be gone for a while.”
Cries, screams, confusion,
Anger, heartbroken,
The feelings running through
These cititzens minds question,
“Why us?”
I’m wondering,
“Why them?”
“I miss you” turns into “I will miss your forever”
WE WILL ONLY GROW STRONGER- B.O.
I liked the part when you say “why us”
I really liked how the emotions are expressed through dialogue and how the reader can feel the feelings.
I like how you used barack obama as a quote, an allusion on the last line.
Lost in a Puzzled Maze
To me poetry is like trying to find an exit in a maze. Not sure which way is the correct way to go but it will either lead you to a good path or a dead end.
I like your comparison between poetry and maze.
I appreciate how your passion for poetry that connects to real life issues.
I agreed to disagreed because it is a very well written poem but in my opinion poetry never has a wrong end:)
I like your comparison between poetry and the maze and how it can lead you seperatr ways !
I like how you compared your relationship to a poetry. It is indeed confusing at times.
I meant how you compared your relationship to poetry as a maze.
A smile to the sun☺
By Atziri Atilano
The sunflower, very bright
Under the shining sun,
Catches my attention
Every morning through
My window.
The sunflower is as bright
As the sun, opening
its petals every morning.
It is a smile,
Who rises very bright
In the faces of
Society, expressing
Love and happiness.
Slowly opening its petals
to the sun, like a
Smile to the world.
-Peace
your poem creates such a calm mood , and great use of imagery
I liked your descriptions!
i like how you compared the sunflower to the sun
The Swiss Army Knife of Cats
The cheetah at its peak
Fierce and quick,
this creative animal terrorizes the animal kingdom
It is like a light
at the end of a tunnel,
when you see it, it’s over with a blink of a eye
It is the “Flash”
in the animal world,
too fast to be seen
The Cheetah strikes with ferocity
its strength to be both agile and strong is unwilling-
Creativity
your great use of imagery made it feel like i was there with the cheetah lol
I like how your comparisons really captured the presence of the Cheetah.
Mystical Being
By Jason Moua
It rose from the steaming pond
And was surprisingly super long
Even the mist was scared of
The golden glare
Along with its reddish hair
And carried a giant turtle shell
Like a ghost,
You will not see it
For it does not exist
Because it is like human
Evolution made it a shield
To learn to co-exist and protect itself
It changes its form
So it can match your thoughts
Beware of the dragon
With traits of a turtle
No one ever fears it
Because of its kindness
i love your poem it was very descriptive =)
Teenage Suicide
“Oh run home to mommy
Run home to the principal”
Said the bully
Daniel continues to
Getting on the school
Bus, feeling alone-
Threatened, worthless
As he arrives home
He quickly rushes into
His room and pulls
Out the gun from
From underneath his bed
He points it towards
His brain, a thousand horrible
Memories roaming through
His head, it had always
Seemed that he was
The target of the kids
Right before he pulls
The trigger, he decides
To leave an informative
Message to his best friend
Richard
As the devastating text
Appears to Richard,
His first instinct is to
Stop Daniel from
Pulling the trigger
Oh how Richard tried
His best, his love for
Daniel was put to
The test, he even
Called Daniel’s parents
But sadly they missed
The call
As Daniel’s parents enter
The home suddenly they
Hear “boom” and that
Was poor old Daniel’s
Way of saying goodbye
See you on the other side
Daniel is finally free
In a better place
Where he will no longer
Have to deal with
The madness, if he only
Knew what he meant
To the rest, but all because
Of a bully, Daniel’s life was
Cut short at his own risk
Now is the time to stop
Bullying the innocent and ask
Yourself-
Is it really worth it?
Because you can be the
Cause of someone’s death
i like how i could imagine these moments…good imagery
Amazing poem , it is so descriptive . And i really like your last stanza
I liked the story and emotions
this story is very touching because it is talking about a real life situation and stuff like this happens. furthermore, i love how u gave a story and after the story gave a message that is important in order to change the ways of the world. Perfection.
Ode to my Bed
My favorite hello
And hardest goodbye
A pillow to lean on
When I cry
As soft as a pillow
All nestled and warm
My favorite place to be
When there is a storm
The blissfulness of comfort
The devoted love of care
A place that is only mine
A place I do not share
So you see
My bed never cheats
My bed never lies
And it is because
It’s my favorite hello
And hardest goodbye
I liked the “It’s my favorite hello
And hardest goodbye” part in your poem.
wow…nice poem
I like the greadiness of your bed in lines 11&12. It is only yours. Lol
Nothing
My relationship to poetry
It’s like having homework on a Saturday night.
You have no choice but to live with it.
You are forced to sit in solitude
thinking and over thinking
lost in your thoughts.
You are trying to find a meaning to it.
But it is as hopeless as trying to put a piece of
paper back together after you burned it.
You might sit and wonder
asking “what has it ever done to you”?
nothing .
It has done nothing.
I have no use for it.
I dislike it.
I liked it when you say “You are forced to sit in solitude
thinking and over thinking
lost in your thoughts.”
I really enjoyed your poem because I can relate so much to it ! And I loved your simile “like having homework on a Saturday night.”
way to be honest about how you feel about poetry, i can relate when you said ” its like having homework on a saturday night “
2 old for LG
My grandmother helped
Pay for this phone
Its screen clear like
A dark starry night
The case is as
Complex as a rubix
Cube
The first layer
Jet black like my
Favourite T-shirt
The second layer as
Beautiful as the sunset
The phone itself
Looks l
Like a skinny twig
Dull small and boring
The case makes it big and exciting
Like a suction cup
They are stuck like a
Newborn
And its mother
It makes my old phone
Seem nonexistent
I don’t wish I had
Any other phone,
It fits my hand
Like a glove
On a cold winters night
I even got it at a
Good price
Alcatel one touch fierce 2
That’s old news
The LG K7 is now
What I’m used to
I like how you explain how you feel about your phone. I also like when you said ” it makes my old phone seem nonexistent ” because that’s how I feel about my old phone.
To You, Mom
Mom I wanted to tell you I love you
I want to see you be happy and smile
I never wanted to make you feel blue
Because you haven’t smiled in a while
Everyday you work, cook, and clean for us
Now I want to work, cook, and clean for you
There are many things we always discuss
These days I want you to feel something new
To me you mean more than words can describe
To me you’re worth more than all that I own
Your name and mine on a tree I inscribe
Memories of you to the world I’ve shown
I’ll say the fire in your eyes still lives
You gave me all, now to you back I’ll give
very touching poem , great use of rhyme scheme
awwww…very nice poem
Its a really heart touching poem, i enjoyed how you put your inner thoughts, you used rhyme scheme perfectly.
Till Death Due Us Part
Like a movie
She leaves her loved ones
Her mother ill, sick
To Africa she goes
Like a movie
There’s always a twist
1 man, 2 men, 3. Shoot
“hold still, stay quiet, don’t run”
Panic. Tears. “why?”
“My family , my children, my husband”
Her husband? Her husband.
Kill no children. Kill no women. Go
Escapes her casket, sneaks back
She sees him
She confronts him
You’re a ghost
You’re going to jail
No. Yes.
Like a movie
Who died in the poem?
The dictions you used really helped me see a contradicting side of the subject. Moreover, the quotes you used helped emphasized the situation and atmosphere feel( mood).
i like the part when you said “You’re a ghost
You’re going to jail
No. Yes.
Like a movie”
Poem relationship
My relationship with poetry is like Sacramento weather.
One day sunny, the next day it’s raining cats and dogs.
We don’t connect, like my phone and the school wifi.
We are cold and hot, we are a twister.
But some day we do get along, like a fat kid and ice cream.
Or like the sun and the plants.
Someday we are like a nerd and a math problem.
Basically we are complicated.
I liked the ending, how it’s just complicated.
I like the idiom you used “One day sunny, the next day it’s rainy cats and dogs.”
great poem , i like your idiom about the cats and dog
You used the idiom ” raining cats and dogs” perfectly.
Jeshjit Singh
04/07/16
period 4
Friendship
I think about you and our great friendship.
Throughout our friendship we had ups and downs.
We had many fun times, but face many hardships.
You make me smile because you are a clown.
You know when to act your age, but I don’t.
You know how childish I can get with you.
You tell me to do things even though I won’t.
Through out my friends you are who I come to.
No doubt that you would ever get replaced.
There is no one that knows me like you do.
Our blessed friendship will never go to a waste.
We are monkeys that belong in a zoo.
We always cherished our silly moments.
Our connection was and is the main focus.
I liked the last part of the sonnet “Our connection was and is the main focus.”
I liked when you said “you make me smile because you are a clown”
And when you said “we are monkeys that belong in the zoo”
Escaping of Animals
Lakshmi walks home
These long walks are
Filled with fear
She doesn’t want to
Return “home”
“Home” is a cave
Of animals awaiting her arrival
She dreads the moment
She is left home with these animals
She can never breathe
Around them it’s a never
Ending suffocation of filthy animals
Forever surrounding her
Her cries for help
Have never been heard
The animals just laugh
They are entertained
By her misery and hopelessness
Before she enters the
Dark cave she turns
She sees a sight never
Seen before
She sees the riches of
Freedom and the
Security of Justice!
Before the animals see
Her, she runs!
She knows where ever
She may end up its
Better than enduring
Hell on earth like
She had been since
A young 16 year old
Running to the green mountains
She comes across a old lady
The lady answers her cries
“Free at last!”
she can now breath.
I like how it’s almost like a story and how you describe the way how you put that at first she can never breath at the beginning to her being a free at last at the end.
I liked the way you organized it as a story, how she first cant breath to being free at last.
I love your use of imagery its almost like I’m there observing the the scene.
My Love For Music
The beat that keeps me going everyday
It helps relieve the stress that eats me up
I don’t worry it helps me anyday
It keeps me warm like a mother and pup
The message it conveys keeps me awake
Usually on failing friendships and love
It sounds so bitter sweet like a cupcake
Through my ear to my thoughts like a pure dove
The artist which I have no preference
The message and beat which I care about
It all deserves a lot of deference
When new music comes out, it makes me shout
If I could listen to it whenever
I won’t think twice and listen forever
I liked how you were able to covey your love of music with a really hard style of poetry being the sonnet!
What kind of music is your favorite?
I like how you uses different sounds if rhyming